I AM HE, Even in the shadows…

In a world where values shape the core of our existence, being a man for me is not synonymous with an upbringing rooted in abuse; instead, it is about embracing humanitarianism and goodwill. This perspective is a departure from the prevalent narrative surrounding masculinity, where men often find themselves subjected to various forms of abuse under the misleading guise of toughness.

While embracing a counter-perspective is undeniably integral, the essence of manhood is a multifaceted construct that transcends stereotypes. This nuanced tapestry of qualities extends beyond the superficial façade often associated with traditional masculinity. The intersectionality of manhood is frequently overlooked, adding layers to the challenges faced by individuals who don't conform to limiting standards. The normalization of extreme behaviors and the recognition of isolated incidents as the sole valid manifestations of 'real abuse' contribute to a harmful narrative that has permeated our cultural consciousness. Regrettably, abuse has been ingrained as the baseline for many men, fostering the misguided belief that enduring such mistreatment is a sign of strength.

This erroneous notion has detrimental consequences, as those unable to withstand such perniciousness are unfairly labeled as weak or inferior. Moreover, the misconception surrounding pleasure and abuse compounds the issue, blurring the lines between acceptable and unacceptable behavior and perpetuating a cycle of harm.

In this complex landscape, many men are silently enduring pain, to the point of becoming numb or accepting it as "just life." The silent suffering of countless individuals underscores the urgency to dismantle the pervasive narrative that associates masculinity with enduring abuse. Troublingly, the mindset of enduring abuse has become essential to shaping success in certain societal spheres, solidifying success when one inflicts normalized abuse onto others. This perpetuates a cycle where those who perpetrate abuse are lauded as the epitome of superior masculinity, further entrenching a damaging stereotype.

Furthermore, abuse is so interwoven within our culture that its absence is met with suspicion. The normalization of abusive tendencies has created an environment where healthy relationships and interactions are viewed with skepticism, perpetuating the misguided notion that abuse is a requisite for success or dominance.

The time has come to challenge and redefine these outdated norms, steering away from a narrative that oversimplifies masculinity. True manhood encompasses resilience, empathy, vulnerability, and a commitment to growth. It involves embracing the complexity of emotions and relationships, cultivating strength not just physically, but emotionally and intellectually. By disassociating manhood from a culture of abuse and embracing values that reflect the rich diversity of masculinity, we can pave the way for a more positive and authentic understanding of what it truly means to be a man. Men care. Men love. Men support.

Love Is A Parable- an initiative and movement that later became an organization within itself. Love is A Parable is a DBA and subsidiary of Altar and Dwelling Place, Inc. We are a charitable and educational 501c3 organization, that provides character, social, and leadership development to those who have an aspiration toward unity, love, and kindness through a reflective thinking approach and sacred-box theory that involves value-based education.

J. Dwayne Garnett, BSRT, MHA, QP
Chief Executive Officer
Love Is A Parable
Available for Empowerment Speaking Engagements, Consultations, Uncovering Sessions, and Instruction.
Find out more about J by clicking HERE!